Reality Rides

Crammed in a bumpy bus-seat,

Lulled by abrupt breaks and over-takes,

I hide my face,

In the crook of his neck;

I close my eyes, fighting,

To hold on, to every sense he is,

Fighting away, the teenage heads, drowned in tubs of hair gel,

The stale breaths of drunkards, cursing to themselves,

And piles of everyday waste, blowing in through the shutters;

 

I entangle my fingers,

Tightly around his,

Trying to feel his life beating through the skin,

Against the loud 6/8 tracks playing on the radio,

The crass, screechy conducting of the conductor,

And the relentless political breakdown from the gentlemen behind us;

 

I nuzzle under his chin,

Thinking how pointless this journey is,

For, I am home,

In the crook of his neck.

 

I breathe in every moment, with great care,

Praying for a prolonged ride,

Before he squeezes my hand to let me know,

It’s time to say goodbye,

And I open my eyes,

Braving my heart to let in,

The world I had blocked out.

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Jar of Secrets

In her empty vessel,
She keeps a jar of secrets.
For every shred of dignity,
She strips off,
They’d tell her,
A secret.

She knew their tales,
Like they knew her facade.
With every touch,
They’d spill their woes on her
And forget.
Them. Her.

She carries them with her,
In her little jar.
Makes them her own,
Sews them in to patchworks
To decorate,
Her empty vessel.

I Wandered

I wandered through the rain,
I wandered through the heat,
The dust shining on my feet,
On top of the sun-burnt skin.
The mud painting my nails,
Raindrops decorating my pants.

I walked till my soles were sore,
Till there’s nowhere near to go.
Every stop I intended to make,
Shun me or flew past me.
I wandered through the day,
I wandered through the night,
Searching for destinations;
For the life I really wish.

I wandered through willowy shades,
I wandered through asphalt torches,
I wandered till there was no path left,
No more places to make destinations.
I wandered till my throat was parched,
And I yearned for any familiar taste.

I wandered back where I began,
Where my life was set for me,
I wandered back knowing,
I’ve exhausted all the paths,
Aware I didn’t sit back sulking,
Letting time and chance take control,
Crush my soul and drag me
Down an exitus road.

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Inertia

I strangled her by the neck.
She struggled
And shrieked.
But I kept squashing her
Breath away.
I locked it in a chest of diffidence
And threw her away
In to the depths of my conscience.

I heard her muffled breaths.
I heard her fists on the lid.
But I did nothing.
I could have grasped her hand.
I could have pulled her up.
But I did nothing.

I let her sapling wings
To dry out on a desert,
When with a drop of water
Her boughs
Could’ve reached the skies.

Now she lies dying
In the deathbed of my life,
Begging me
For a single breath;
A breath of hope or try.
A breath of miracle.

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I look down to her,
Her body ashened,
Her eyes grey,
And I struggle.

I struggle to lay before her,
That there were no more
Miracles to come.
That I’ve gambled them all
For none.

That the more she struggles
To survive a day
The more agonised
Our each breath would be,
And the more of me
She’d take away.

She defined me once.
But I’ve crippled her now,
She’ll sink, defunct,
In to a dark corner
Of my deformed heart.

All she’ll ever be
Is a dream
That I wrecked
With my inertia.